With the growing pressure to resign from Congress, George Santos will need a next job. Given he embellished some truth regarding his past, George has huge potential with follow on lies about his next job, the one he’s going to take when he resigns from the House. Of course, he’ll miss being Chair of the House Ethics Committee.
George will announce that he’s doing one of the following:
Doubling down on his Jew-ish background, he’s going to become more observant and open a Chabad house in Mecca.
George will return to NYU as Chair of the Department of Government Ethics. That he never seems to have gone there may be an issue, but he did ghost write a lot of Bob Dylan songs while hanging out in Washington Square.
This is a tough choice. Will he return to Goldman Sachs or Cititgroup? While neither companies have any record of his having worked there, it is just a case of misplaced paperwork.
George will disclose exactly under which mattress he found the $700,000 he lent his own campaign. And he’ll demand that the Republican National Committee find the money to reimburse him. That should keep him in cash for a while.
An avid lover of animals, George will either resurrect his seemingly non-existent Friends of Animals United and devote himself to rescuing feral Burmese pythons in Florida, or my kids’ missing gerbils.
An avid Buddhist, George will enter a year long silent mediation in Bhutan, prior to becoming the next Dalai Lama.
George will bring back to life the people he claimed were his employees who died at the Pulse nightclub shooting. If that’s not possible, he’ll hear from them in a seance.
Or George will go with the old standby, “I want to spend more time with my family.” That he doesn’t seem to have a family should not be an issue for George.